Hey, guys! You know what's awesome? Prismatic canines that have a magic key that can open doors to other dimensions.
|"We'll acknowledge Atlantis: Milo's Return and Belle's Magical World but not this."|
But all in all, there's not much more to say about the Fluppy Dogs, cute as they may be, that hasn't already been said in Part 1, so I'm just going to use this space to inform the readers that, as always, start with Part 1 first. Because I'm not responsible for breaking your brain if you enter Part 2 unprepared.
Time to once again touch upon the piece of animation Disney likes to pretend doesn't exist (on account they forgot it exists), this is...
When we last left the Fluppy Dogs, they had stumbled into our world by mistake (like all creatures of this nature are wont to do) after deploying a magic key that can open doors through time and space. They found out that the human world is a strange place full of food marts, moving vehicles, and rich jerks, and they were quickly captured by animal control because they and their alien technology was no match for human ingenuity. While the leader of the dog got adopted by a family of bland and the purple female dog got adopted by a weird neighbor girl, a rich, senior version of Gaston was determined to make the dogs (only they insist they're not really dogs) a part of his collection. Through the use of magic levitating dog ear dust and a bed, the Flups were able to bail the rest out and now they hide out in bland kid's room, ready to regroup and tackle finding their home dimension once more.
In short, this movie really doesn't make much sense and to expect it to start making sense now is giving this way too much credit.
It's now morning, and the lead Fluppy Dog and Jamie are discussing how the cuddly marketable aliens have to leave for their home dimension now that everyone's together. They do this over breakfast, but what's notable about this scene is that Stanley is eating like ten chicken legs while Jamie is settling on some sad looking pieces of bread. I'm sure Jamie's mother was just fine with her son feeding the dog enough leftovers for five people.
Also, wait. Chicken bones? Chicken bones are unsafe to give to a dog! Way to try to kill the closest thing you had to a friend, Jamie!
|"I don't think anyone's going to remember me after this special is over."|
"That's not true! People still remember Mr. Boogedy, right?"
Unfortunately, this bizarre scene doesn't last, because then his mom bursts in and wonders just what the hell is going on. Because come on, wouldn't you? She even examines her son's forehead in case a really high fever causing his strange, animalistic behavior. Yeah, sure, because this happens when I'm sick all the time!
|Jamie, please get help. You're endangering your family.|
This would also probably be more touching if I didn't know ahead of time that there's more than 20 minutes left in this special. One of the disadvantages of watching something on the Internet, I guess.
|Each sold separately.|
|"Sammy, your love letter to Jason has tons of grammar errors. Please see me after class."|
Uh, Jamie? You sort of already left school. The teacher saw you leave her classroom and everything.
|So he runs out of school to meet up with some strangers hiding in the bushes. |
That isn't suspicious at all!
The dogs, creeped out by this strange bizzaro world where the only form of miscreant behavior is some old guy with a net, lead him to the spot where they can't reach. Apparently the door is underneath the street, leading me to wonder whether doors had to be in open air or if they ever had an instance where it appeared six miles deep within a world's crust.
Also, tunnels underneath a street. You know what that means.
|Two seconds later, he was hit by a car.|
By the way, I love how in cartoons, sewers in every city are just easily accessible and open to the public. You'd think there would be health code violations preventing this sort of thing. Human feces are considered bio-hazardous waste for a reason.
|On the bright side, if he ends up in mutagen, he'll turn into a giant half-dog hybrid |
and become ten times cooler.
Yeah, movie? Just wondering, but why did they wait until now to bring up this plot point? They've opened doors two other times in this movie, and they certainly weren't worried before. Introducing something so important late in the game just feels like a cop-out.
|"Aww, my whistle pop's radioactive."|
|"Oh, dogs magically creating a door out of thin air. That's kind of cool."|
Plus, why the hell is that tree bark turquoise? Are there strange azure-colored trees in another world? Man, I'm missing out.
|Tippi and the doorknob are making the same expression.|
For starters, what is this world like? Did the door open in the middle of a lake or is there a civilized world covered in 100% water that we'll never get to see thanks to this explosion of fluid? What do the people on the other side of the door feel? Is Jamie going to catch some strange alien disease by swimming around in liquids teeming with bacteria his immune system can't recognize?
...yeah, I should move on before I drive myself crazy.
|I bet the workers at the waste treatment plant had loads of fun fishing their corpses out of the filter tank.|
I will give the man credit where credit is due. When his rotund, ever-loyal butler points out the strange amount of water pouring out of the manhole, he retorts by saying they're after puppies, not guppies. Ooooh! Sick burn!
|"Sir, the sewer pipes are leaking."|
"Let the peasants deal with it. They deserve it by being poor."
And, okay, I'm starting to warm up to Wagstaff. Just because it's just so ridiculous that the moment he sees water shooting out of the street, he orders his butler to park the car (in the middle of the road, no less, blocking traffic) and to grab the nets. For some reason, seeing an old man try to tackle a giant plume of water with a net designed for catching butterflies is freaking hilarious. It's one of those defining moments that will always stick with you throughout your life once your eyes lay witness to it.
|Okay, seriously, where the hell is everybody? Where's the traffic? This town is freaking deserted!|
|Wow, and right in public too.|
...also, I love how upbeat Claire is even though the neighborhood kid is asking her from the bushes to keep watch and make sure his mom doesn't see him strip himself (literally) of the evidence caused by him doing something terribly illegal. She even says "Fantastic!", because hey, talking dogs.
|"I should find this creepy that all of you are spying on me, but nah, I'm cool with it."|
Wagstaff says that there has to be a better way at catching those sentient beasts, and then immediately he does what else but think up of a better way. Why, offer a reward on the mythical creatures! Of course! Then the commoners will do all the work for him in exchange for a small amount of cash! Ah, the exploitation of a lower class. Always a good plot point for a cartoon.
|"Uh, Mr. Wagstaff? If you find a folder labeled 'Furry porn', it's not mine. Honest."|
Although honestly, considering all the worlds they've been running through and all of the alien diseases they've been in contact with, the Fluppies should be lucky that they're alive.
|You'd think animals that live in a world of snow would be better insulated against water.|
I just want to point out that out of all of the prismatic animals, only the green dog can actually sniff out and pinpoint doors. This will be important later, since this trait and the fact that he's really the most valuable member of the team is basically the story subtly telling us all that Ozzie is going to get himself into trouble. I'm totally calling it right now. Disney's known for leaving anvil-sized plot points scattered throughout their storytelling.
|I can just picture Jamie's mom making excuses over her giant pile of newspapers. |
Because what if they want to read headlines from 1982?
Anyways, they open the door, and it isn't their world. Makes sense, because that would be one boring ending if the dogs just incidentally found the door and went on their merry way, all while Wagstaff ends up killing himself on a hopeless quest of finding magical animals he swore he saw in the streets one day.
|They made a game with this portal-jumping concept. I think it's called "Spyro the Dragon".|
|Or maybe this is a case of subtle marketing and this beast is really a Hungry Hungry Hippo.|
Since this movie is about as easy to read as a Dr. Suess book, the moment a strange, exotic creature wanders into a child's life, he has to try and hide it from his parent (where the hell is Jamie's dad? Is his mother a single mom?) without looking too suspicious, and right when she leaves to get groceries, the deformed aberration charges up the stairs and into the living room. This leads to some rather expected slapstick involving the objects in Jamie's house nearly getting destroyed.
Furthermore, this is probably a bad sign and reflects on my mentality, but watching this scene doesn't fill me with mystical feelings and childish wonder. Instead I cringe and think about how expensive a piano or sofa is. This scene is really the first time we see a huge portion of where Jamie lives, and it's a really nice house.
|Oh, thanks, Falumpus. Do you know how much it costs to buy a grand piano?|
Course, when Jamie sees the mess the creature made, his self-esteem just plummets. He knows his mom's going to kill him now. Just like she killed his father.
|I can picture his mother now. "Son, you should know better than to allow an earthquake to happen!"|
But not even mediocre music can hide the part where one of the
|That's not water.|
|"Moving furniture and rearranging picture frames is so arousing!"|
And man, that teacher must really hate Jamie. First the whole scene with them pointing out his homework and now this. Jamie has made a very powerful enemy. He will rue the day he turned in an incomplete assignment!
|"That deadbeat better have my alimony check in the mail or else I'm cutting his visitation."|
|"Mom, I can't help it! The animators made me so indistinct and featureless!"|
I love this scene, by the way, just because it's so bizarre and stupid that it practically defies words. Wagstaff is showing us an ink illustration from a book and telling us that this is his dog. And yet everyone (including the mom) falls for this commercial. How dumb is this city?
|I bet people assumed that Wagstaff is such a pretentious asshole that he got |
a woodcut portrait of his own dog.
He also gets chewed out by his mom for wanting to help her with the housework, because kids suddenly taking interest in helping their parents is immediately suspicious. But then again, considering Jamie's behavior earlier, she has plenty of reasons to be concerned.
|"Don't worry, son. The psychiatric ward is full of nice people and they'll take care of you."|
And, in a strange turn of events, the door they open turns out to be the right door that leads back home. Well, huh. It's a little early, but I'll buy it.
Here is where we get our first glimpse into the Fluppy Dog world, and I'm a little disappointed. Wagstaff's book mentioned snowy lands and twinkling rainbow lights, and that's literally all they gave us. No dog cities, no amazing Fluppy architecture. Nothing. Just snow, rainbows, and yellow crystals (which I noticed are made from the same material as the key) growing out of the ground. What do the dogs even do in their spare time? Frolicking in the snow must get real old real fast.
|Oh good. After they bought that expansion, they can now make it to Outland.|
As you can imagine, Wagstaff is kind of suspicious about this. Because magical dogs.
|And all of that atomic energy released by the magical door ends up leveling the entire city.|
|When there's trouble, you call DW!|
|I bet he makes this face whenever he uses a snowmobile to make rabbits' hearts explode.|
|When hinges creak in doorless chambers, and strange and frightening sounds echo through the halls...|
|"Yeah, dog, don't play dumb. I know you're magical because you're green."|
As you might expect, this draws the attention of Jamie's beleaguered mom, because her son happens to be stupid enough to grab every last vegetable from the fridge and pretend that nothing strange is happening. Jamie would make one crappy ninja if this is the stealthiest he can manage.
|At least he's eating healthy.|
...yeah, lady. No offense, but what the hell did you expect?
|"Really, Jamie. If you can't handle a magical, folkloric beast that can speak, then you're |
not getting a basilisk for Christmas."
Wow. Their friend has been captured and that's what you tell them? That's cold.
|There's a female dog in this screenshot and it's certainly not Tippi...|
While she drives off with the back of her car inconspicuously stuffed with equipment designed to break into houses (way to not do your job, police), Jamie happens to be doing homework and he just so happens to catch a Fluppy-loaded car filled with action supplies just driving away. Can you imagine if this is the last time we actually saw Jamie? Nothing says "numbnuts" like being left out of a whimsical adventure involving fairy-tale pooches on account you pissed off your parent and you had to do your homework.
|"Aww man, I wasn't invited to the big showdown in my own movie! Weak!"|
I love how stupid this kid looks on his giant hippo monster, by the way. Here I was, thinking that him and his giant hat couldn't get any dorkier, and yet it's come to this.
|"The guys in my guild are going to be soooo jealous!"|
And, since I have to point this out, the part where Wagstaff goes "That's not an ordinary dog, that is a Fluppy!" is literally the only part besides the glowing key I remember seeing from this movie. It's one of those lines that lingered in my head forever and I couldn't pinpoint where it came from. Something about the way Wagstaff said it burrowed into my five-year-old brain and remained there for years even though I had long dismissed this movie as something I just made up.
Furthermore, it must be tiring to constantly wear a tie. Doesn't Wagstaff ever dress casually?
|"Your cuddly adorableness has no effect on me!"|
...and I meant Lucy the python, not whatever the hell you just pictured.
Unfortunately, it turns out that Claire really should've gone with the magical flying bed, because when she pulls her car into Wagstaff's property, he instantly knows that she's there and he spots her cargo of Fluppies. With an excited "More Fluppies!" (god, I love his Fluppy lines), he then decides to prepare "a reception" for his new guests like any decent Bond villain.
I love his telescope too. It really invokes a "Rear Window" feel to this already interesting character. Because hey, if you have enough money to scare the neighbors, by all means.
|Ever since that family of reality show supermodels moved in next door, that thing's been seeing a lot of use.|
Nevertheless, the Fluppies press on and ignore these disgusting displays until they discover Ozzie. Oh good, that was easy. This clearly isn't suspicious at all, the fact that they found their friend without running into Wagstaff.
But then, Ozzie screams that it's a trap. I figured as much. What's the trap?
|"Run, Stanley! He has shoddy, poorly built animal cages at his disposal!"|
|So they can talk and have an inter-dimensional key, and yet they're thwarted by an old man. Huh.|
|"Yes! Fill the room with your rare hatred! It gives me sustenance!"|
|"Jeeves, kindly fetch me my booze and pretzels."|
Ugly orange hippo continues smashing through Wagstaff's expensive stuff, and all the villain can muster up the energy for is a very stern power walk. It's a good thing this monster that can bash through solid concrete is afraid of snakes or else he never would've stopped them.
...do snakes even exist in the Falumpus world?
|I'm curious about Lucy's backstory, to be honest. Was she always a bad snake or did |
Wagstaff warp her fragile, reptilian mind?
The funny thing about this? It's completely true. Technically the law is on Wagstaff's side and technically none of his actions in this show (save for stealing a camera and speeding, but minor offenses compared to trespassing and sending a wild animal through someone's house) have been illegal. It's sad that he's capturing Fluppy Dogs, but there's nothing in the law books that says he can't.
|I guess Jamie and Claire are breaking the law if you put it that way...|
Huh, despite his frailty, his weirdly colored hair, and his dumb ideas, Wagstaff won.
|"Don't worry, Jamie. We're bound to outlive this geezer."|
|Dun dun dunnnn...|
...yeah, at this point, it should be pretty clear what's going to happen next, and I'm ashamed that it had to lead to this. Tinkerbell should be angry that they're ripping off the ending of Peter Pan with this stunt.
Also wait. Wagstaff saw the dogs escape on a levitating bed. He seriously didn't remember that incident and wasn't prepared for this magic power? What an idiot!
|"Why yes, I'm going to allow the children who hate me to get within arm's reach |
of the magical dogs with unexplained powers. I'm a genius!"
Yes, my friends. The dogs' magical sparkly dandruff is lifting an entire portion of the mansion right up into the air. The pixie dust isn't enough to go to full gambit and lift the entire structure off from its foundation, but then again, they were probably on a tight budget with this special.
|Again, absolutely no one noticed this. I hate this town and its stupid people.|
...and why do I get the feeling that the only reason this orange abomination exists is so there can be a "giant butt crushes the villain" joke?
|Stay classy, Disney.|
What the? Wait a second. There were tons of other animals in those cages. Why the hell are they not pouring out of the house?
...oh god. Oh god. You seriously had to do that, Disney. You seriously had to kill them. That's dark.
|Not pictured: Endangered animals getting crushed to death by a house.|
I haven't pointed this out enough times, but I hate how none of the expressions in this movie really reflect the severity of what's going on. The only key to his home is about ready to lose all of its magic, and Ozzie just looks slightly bummed out. For the love of god, somebody act in this movie! Just because they're cute doesn't mean their looks alone are engaging me!
|"I hate rock candy."|
It just hit me. These dogs look nothing like the toy line. Thanks for the false advertising, Kenner Toys.
I'm just a tiny bit disappointed because technically, we already got a scene like this over twenty minutes ago when Stanley was convinced he was going to find the door back home while Jamie was in school. And then we got another scene like this where Jamie was saying goodbye to them back at Wagjerk's place. How many times does he have to sniffle, cry, and say he misses them before we get it?
But, like a fearsome zombie rising from its grave, Wagstaff and Hamish dig themselves out of the rubble and are still after those Fluppies. Geez, dude. They destroyed a large portion of their house through dandruff levitation and are running through a Stargate to get back to their world. Just admit you've lost and move on!
Meanwhile, some animals leak out of the house, letting us know that not all of them got crushed into gory red paste underneath the broken mortar, but they're all common animals like birds and rabbits when Gaston had a timber wolf, a platypus, a lion, and a deer. We never see those animals again, but I'm sure the library staff got a kick out of seeing endangered carcasses in front of the main entrance. Just as much as they got a kick out of the destroyed house that's now in their parking lot. Fluppies; they may be adorable, but they certainly don't give a crap about anti-littering laws.
|And when they jump inside, they get a loading screen telling them how many gems |
they've collected in the previous world.
I dig the irony (Wagstaff wanted Fluppies and he got Fluppies alright), but I can't help but picture the Fluppy Race hearing about his torture wrecked on their fellow tribe members and they horribly execute this man to appease their furry pantheon of gods. Or, if Fluppy civilization is a lot like our world, they send him to death row and both Wagstaff and Hamish die in prison thanks to multiple appeals.
...or they just die of exposure from being stuck in the snow. Either way these two are going to die.
|In fact, I'm pretty sure Wagstaff's having a heart attack right now.|
...I wonder if Wagstaff's mysterious disappearance and his strangely destroyed mansion with the inexplicable rubble far away from the scene of the crime still haunts the conspiracy tabloids to this very day.
|Jamie has been the perfect student ever since the men in the white coats gave him those tranquilizers.|
Additionally, I like how the dogs' clothes and accessories were conveniently forgotten by everyone involved in this movie. Remember Stanley's hat and Tippi's camera? The animators sure don't!
And, by the way, is it me or do I find the idea of a sentient creature with the same level of intelligence as a human licking Jamie's face kind of disturbing?
|And they called it Fluppy love...|
|Fluppycraft 2: Beyond the Dark Portal|
Be afraid, readers, because this movie is hinting towards a potential dog-related apocalypse that may be on the horizon.
|Wait, but back in the beginning, the Fluppies made fun of Earth dogs because they wear clothes. |
These Fluppies aren't wearing anything. Explain, movie!
That's adorable, right?
The Morals of this Movie
*Never adopt strangely colored animals from the pound, because they could be sentient aliens that influence your son to play hooky.
*Rich people are assholes.
*If you're exploring other worlds, for the love of god, bring a map or something to mark down where your home door is. Otherwise you could get stranded like the Fluppy Dogs.
*If Earth is taken over by flea-bitten canine overlords, welcome them and offer to round up slaves to toil in their underground kibble caves.
There is one phrase that comes to mind when I watched this movie, and that's "wasted potential".
In a way, this would've been really cool as a series and I'm sad that it wasn't a series, but at the same time, I can totally understand why this wasn't picked up. I think my main problem with this was that good ideas were coated by a thin candy shell of blandness. None of the characters are really engaging and nothing feels like its in any real danger. It's just got a saccharine taste to it, which reminds me a little of The Wuzzles, and I think the reason for that is because no one was sure which audience to aim for, so they felt they had to "tone it down" and impress nobody. It's a little too much of a product of its time and didn't age as well as Gummi Bears.
All in all, had potential but wasn't pushed far enough to be great.
At the same time, this has really good animation for its time and there's sort of a cute charm to it. I'm going to only half-recommend this. Watch it if you want to discover a long-lost piece of Disney lore and impress your fellow Disney-loving friends. Don't watch it if you're expecting miracles.
All in all, a goofy special that I couldn't watch with a straight face. Could've been a lot more exciting, but it's completely harmless. I don't hate this movie, but at the same time, I can't see this becoming a regular thing for me to watch. It's merely okay.